She’s open waiting for more

And I know he’s only looking to score

And it is way too unhealthy often they’ve typically

Been starved for attention before

– Blink 182


Tay mentioned something in the BFF group text about our 10-year reunion, “Would y’all do the reunion? I’m only going if y’all go but I’m okay not going at all.”

Naturally, my response was, “Uhh no. Like, who do we care about seeing that we don’t already see? And there’s a reunion???” “Yeah are you not in the Facebook group?” “HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. No.” “I added you!” “Gee. Thanks.”

After a few minutes of stalking, I sent the following message, “Come to think of it. I probably left this group… Anywho. Tay. I can’t afford to come home at Thanksgiving. I just spent a shit-ton of money on an unexpected plane ticket when Nana was in the hospital. Kristen is going to be here (SanD) for Thanksgiving. And YOU are having the boys. NONE of us can go. Are you crazy?!?”

A couple things, Ballas.

  1. Sometimes, I can be every bit as anti-social as my Dad.
  2. If Tay could go back and repeat any time in her life it has always been high school. She loved it. Me, on the other hand, wouldn’t repeat anything… especially high school.
  3. About a month ago, Nana was in the hospital due to complications with her heart. After a particularly upsetting phone call with Momma, I immediately left work, booked a seat on the red-eye that night, dropped the puppies off at my neighbor’s and went home to Charleston for a week. Thankfully, Nana is doing so very much better now! She was sent home from the hospital the day after I arrived back in San Diego. Please pray she only continues to get more, and more strength back.
  4. It is true. My sweet best friend is pregnant – with TWINS! Identical twin boys, to be exact! If I were anymore excited I would burst. I cry nearly every time I think about them. Yes, I am that blubbering idiot. I tell everyone I come into contact with about my teeny, tiny, growing nephews. I am so excited to meet them in December!

Now that the news portion of this post is out of the way… back to this 10-year reunion business.

Look, I’m not opposed to reunions, I just kinda feel like they should be later on in life. You know, maybe after we’ve gotten to the point that we’re so old we don’t recognize each other. That’d be cool. I’d go to that. But five and 10 years after graduation? Pisssh. I know idiots who’ve taken more time to get an associates degree.

So, I’ll politely decline.

And maybe post this to the Facebook group… just to give them something to talk shit about:


  • What was your school’s name?
    Alexander Central High School
  • When did you graduate?
    On my eighteenth birthday – June 10, 2006.
  • What was your school mascot?
    A cougar.
  • Can you sing the fight song?
    Ummm, we had one of those?
  • It’s Friday night, where were you?
    Working at the video store, at a football game, a sleepover with the girls, hanging out with Jeb, orrrrr sneaking around… [eye-roll emoji]
  • What kind of job did you have in high school?
    I was a cashier at a locally owned video store, Pik-a-Video. Yes, back when I was in high school, you actually had to go rent a movie from a store.
  • Did you car pool to school?
    When we were too young to drive, Kayla and I would let just about anyone take us to and from school. But after I got my license, I took her to school… and then she had to take me once I totaled my car.
  • What kind of car did you have?
    Dodge Neon/Honda Accord
  • Were you a party animal?
    Maybe? I mean, there weren’t many parties thrown that we missed. We weren’t too outrageous though. We were pretty decent kids.
  • Were you in band, the orchestra or choir?
    Mad choir mostly… until I got kicked out senior year. Vannoy got pissed because I ditched him first semester to be a TA and then wouldn’t let me back in second semester. (Note to kids today: You’re welc for being the cause of that little rule.) Whatevs. That meant I got to leave school at 11:10 a.m. every day. I managed.
  • Were you a nerd?
    I got really good grades, was in all of the higher level classes, but never studied. Just naturally intelligent, I guess. [Hair flip.]
  • Did you get suspended or detention?
    Nope, never.
  • Who was your favorite teacher?
    I had lots of favorites! I have great memories from each class, with every teacher throughout my high school career. I can probably count on one hand the number of teachers I didn’t care for very much.
  • Where did you sit at lunch?
    Mostly, the big round tables in the center of the cafeteria. Second semester of senior year though, I ate at home. 🙂
  • Did you have fun at Prom?
    My sophomore and junior proms were ‘ight. However, as far as senior proms go, I could not have asked for a better one.


  • What was the dumbest thing you did in high school, and did you have fun doing it?
    Probably sneaking around with Tyler. Did I have fun doing it? Yes. At the time, it was exciting, and fun, and adventurous, and the worst thing I had ever done. Was it worth it? No… yes. I wouldn’t be the woman I am today had it not been for the girl I was back then.
  • Favorite song in High School?
    Sweet Jesus. So. Many! Get Low, Gold Digger, My Humps, Freek-a-Leek, Throw It Up, Dirty Little Secret (… for obvious reasons), the entire Enema of the State CD, etc. Ahh and mixed CDs! I had so many, if I took a turn too hard they would all come crashing down out of my visor holders. Such a hazard!
  • What is your most vivid memory from your years at school?
    Right this very second: Junior year. Night 1 of the cruise. Shane Incredible Hulk-ing me out of the pool when I rammed my face into the concrete.
  • Did you have a best friend in school?
    I had a whole crew of best friends – the Possy. We basically spent four entire years attached at the hip.


  • Did you have an arch enemy at school?
    I don’t know. Did I…
  • Did you participate in any of the school plays?
    Only if you count Mad Feast and Dinner Theater.
  • What was the funniest moment?
    When Kristen, Joan, and Kayla went to jail.
  • What was your most embarrassing moment?
    Waking up after a party at Eric’s to: 1. Being the only party guest left. 2. His mother making breakfast. 3. And then, hearing, “You’re the first girl to ever stay the night.” Great. Just fucking awesome. #notawhore #promise
  • Is there something you wanted to do in high school but never did?
    There were a lot of people I wanted to punch in the throat back then but never did…
  • Which classmate influenced you the most?
    Depends on who needed to cheat off of whom that day…
  • What was your favorite class?
    We really did have a lot of fun in chorus. Even though I can’t dance for shit.
  • What did you have for a typical lunch?
    Screw typical! Taco Tuesday or Baked Potato Day was my jam! #longlivetherunnycheese #thanksalotobama
  • If you could go back and do it again – would you?
    Absolutely not. I don’t remember much, but what I do remember wasn’t that awesome. I enjoy life now. Now, I am heavily medicated.



  • What kind of car do you have?
    Acura TSX


  • It is Friday night, where are you now?
    Playing with the puppies, Netflixing, shopping at Target, going out to dinner, or napping – probably Netflixing and napping though.
  • What kind of job do you have now?
    Technical Writer for an anti-virus software company.
  • How long have you been in your current position?
    Nearly 10 months.
  • What degrees have you obtained?
    I have a BS in Public Relations and Sociology from Appalachian State University.
  • What was your first paying job after graduation?
    After high school graduation, I worked as a waitress at Michael’s on 4th in downtown Hickory the summer between my Freshman and Sophomore year in college. After college graduation, I worked at Fiserv.
  • What did you want to be in high school, and are you now doing it now?
    I wanted to be a lawyer. The closest I came to “doing it” was taking the LSAT in 2014. As much as I think I would enjoy the work… I don’t want to go back to school more.
  • Do you still talk to the person you went to Prom with?
    I do. He is still one of my best friends.
  • Do you still talk to people from school?
    The only friends I have (with the exception of just a few) are people I went to school with… honestly, I was in most of their weddings.



  • What have you been up to since graduation?
    Basically, working. Working to live, and buy stuff, and go places, and do things. Ugh. So annoying I haven’t come into my billions yet.
  • What occupation would you choose if money and time was not an issue?
    I would be an actress on a crime drama. Or maybe, be the next Chelsea Handler – except I would be Chelsea Howton. Or maybe, I wouldn’t. I would travel, and write, and read, and soak up all the history, and see all the places, and do all the stuff.
  • When I retire I will…
    be dead. I’m of the belief that our generation will never get the luxury to retire.
  • What are your hobbies?
    I read. I write. I travel. I do whatever the fuck I want.


  • Name the places you have lived.
    Hickory, NC/Boone, NC/San Diego, CA
  • Where do you currently live?
    San Diego, CA


  • How long have you lived there?
    One year.
  • How did you end up living there?
    Long story short, Kristen offered me her spare bedroom.


  • What are your plans for the next decade?
    Pay off debt, buy a new house, amp up the travel itinerary, and not die.
  • What are your favorite books?
    Geez. I have so many. I try to finish at least one book a month, more if I have the time. As you could imagine, I’m not into anything that makes me cry or really tugs at the ol’ heartstrings. Most of my favorite authors write mindless fiction with lots of characters and silly mysteries. I like autobiographical stuff, as well.


  • What are your favorite movies?
    Mafia and Disney movies. The Fast and the Furious franchise, with the exception of Tokyo Drift, of course. Big Daddy.
  • What are your favorite TV shows?
    Mostly anything on Bravo, E!, and ID. As far as scripted content goes: Game of Thrones, Scandal, and How to Get Away with Murder.
  • What is your favorite food?
    Gravy, pasta, rice, things that remind me of home, and lots of fast food.


  • What is your favorite snack?
    Candy, hot fudge brownies, cheese sticks, chips and salsa…
  • What is your favorite beverage?
    Water, sweet tea, diet ginger ale, and a fountain Coke (preferably from McDonalds) – all out of plastic cups with lots of ice, thanks.
  • What is your favorite quote?
    “Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good.” – Romans 12:9
    “You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories. If people wanted you to write warmly about them, they should’ve behaved better.”


  • Who is your favorite musical group?
    Blink 182, Nirvana, Journey, the Spice Girls…
  • What is your favorite season?
    Not winter.
  • What sports do you watch/follow?
    The violent ones. I kid. Football.
  • What is your favorite team?
    The Cincinnati Bengals. I dig their helmets. But I wouldn’t consider myself a fan, per se.
  • What were the difficult times of your life?
    Well, 2007 sucked balls. And then, maybe 2014 until mid-2015? Give or take a year, or four.
  • Are you married? Did you marry someone from your high school?
    No and no.
  • Do You Have Children? Names/ages?
    I have puppy childs! Sonny is 8 and Styx is 3.5 months old.


  • What do they do that makes you proud?
    Not vomit, shit, or pee in or around any building or structure. Listen.
  • What funny stories do you have about your children?
    I have plenty of funny stories… but they mostly involve poop.
  • What are your parents doing now?
    They still live in the house I grew up in on Bayberry Drive. Momma is a buyer for PFG/IFH. She has worked there for 20+ years. And Dad is a plant manager for Pierre Foods. They are enjoying their empty nest and standard poodle, Teddy.
  • Any interesting things you would like to mention about the family?
    My family is doing pretty awesome. Bubba works for Penske as a tire jack and gas man. He travels around the country every weekend on private jets working various races. When he’s not doing that, he’s in Bethlehem taking care of the house I left behind, hanging with his sweet girlfriend, playing with their German Shepard, or shooting her cat with an air-soft gun. Mace got into the Mathematics and Engineering program at NC State. She basically owned her Freshman year of college – the kid is a genius. This summer, Mace got her first job as a hostess at a local restaurant and she recently chopped off all her hair. Everyone is healthy, happy, thriving, and not smoking meth.


  • What was your favorite vacation?
    Both cross-country trips and any vacation I take with my family. I’ve talked a lot about my cross-country trips on the blog so I won’t get into those here. But vacations with my family – a fucking riot.


  • What vacations do you have planned for next year?
    Sorry! That’s top-secret info…
  • Where would you like to travel in the future?
    The shorter list is where wouldn’t I want to travel to in the future?! My dream is Egypt but I want to go everywhere! I would never turn down a trip to see another land and experience another culture. The more you see, the more you know. And I want to know all the things!


Answering these questions – specifically the ones about my past – was difficult.

I cringe at some of the decisions I made in high school. Who was that girl? What made her do those things? Why did she think she was so badass? And why the hell would she fight so hard for someone who treated everyone – even his best friends – so poorly?

Now, I sorta laugh at her. I laugh at the balls of that little girl. I laugh at how self-aware, and strong, and independent, and intelligent she considered herself to be. I laugh at how silly her tiny little world was.

If I could go back now and tell that teenager anything, it would be: You get what you think you deserve. And you, darlin’, have a whole helluva lot more thinkin’ to do.

But I can’t.

So, I just have to be grateful that all of my dumb decisions lead me here…




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1 thought on “Mutt

  1. HAHA, I love your sense of humour! Funny, I am planning a 50 year high school reunion for my close high school friends, at the home of my good friend, Sharon who lives in Murfreesboro, TENN. We have classmates coming from California, Washington, Texas, WIsconsin, Georgia, florida, kind of neat since we graduated from high school in Japan. So excited to go, then I just found out her friends are having a baby shower that same weekend…Rats! Just got home from Costa Rica, so I do LOVE to travel, just like you! Did SUP the other day and I thought of you. Take care, thinking of you, and getting excited about Mere and Bradley's babies….YAY!

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