Well East coast girls are hip
I really dig those styles they wear
And the Southern girls with the way they talk
They knock me out when I’m down there
– Beach Boys
Haven’t been a huge fan of TimeHop here lately.
And that tab on Facebook – “On This Day” – yeah, it kinda sucks too.
There should be a stronger gate guarding certain parts of memory lane. I imagine something more difficult to maneuver. Maybe a steal box? Said box would be wrapped in heavy chains fastened by iron locks. It would be under the protection of a fire-breathing dragon – a dragon that only eats Troll dolls and chicken nuggets. And being that Trolls haven’t been a “thing” since, like, the ’90s… homeboy is hungry. Oh, and did I happen to mention that the steal box this particular dragon protects is at the bottom of the ocean? ‘Cause it is. The box is at the bottom of the Arctic Ocean. Where there are angry polar bears, and those walruses with the huge wieners, and icebergs – lots of icebergs.
But since stupid technology has made the past so easily accessible… I start each morning off with a brisk walk down “What Used To Be” Lane. Last Friday, was a Sour Patch Kid kinda day.
At first, it was sour.
Then, it was sweet.
I thought, “Ya know, MC, it’s Friday. You’re looking something fierce today and tomorrow is Halloween – only your most favoritest day of the year. Ignore the sour. Today, choose to mull over the sweet.”
And so I did.
Two years ago, I would have never imagined my life would be here – in San Diego – with Kristen. I brought her out here. I dropped her off at her new home, said, “See ya later,” and thought nothing more about California. I thought my story had already been written in the stars. I was convinced that a small town in North Carolina would be the end of the line for me. I anticipated a lifetime of living vicariously through my best friend – the nomad.
Yet, here we are.
Roomies: Round Three.
On Thursday night, we watched Casper with the dogs. Saturday night, we spent the day with friends, dressed up, and then went out in Solana Beach. This weekend, we go to Big Bear. In a few weeks, we are making a trip up to LA. It’s very much a Thelma and Louise situation up in this piece but I’m enjoying it. And I am thankful. So very thankful I have a best friend like her – a friend who is generous enough to open her home up to me during my time of need. Moving away from North Carolina has been such a therapeutic experience for me and I could not imagine going on this journey with anyone else. I am eternally grateful for her (and her husband’s) generosity. My life has been forever changed.
The post above (again, sweet, not sour) had me thinking about home too. So many people ask me what I miss most about Carolina. I never have a good answer. Parts of me kinda want to say, “If I missed it that much do you think I would have left in the first place?” But for whatever reason, I have been comparing the two states pretty relentlessly in my mind this week. Here is what I’ve got so far:
- My family and friends (duh.)
- Sweet tea
- Only being a 3.5 hour drive from my grandparents
- Really good nasty Mexican food
- Ice cubes in my drinking water (because California is so fucking stingy with the H2O)
- My sweet little house with all of my cute stuff
- People switching lanes, going the speed limit (at the very least), not weaving their motorcycles in and out of traffic, etc.
- Better Walmart
- Normal gas pumps
- Not a whole lota FOMO going on
- I haven’t put gas in my car for three weeks
- Beautiful weather
- Living minutes away from the ocean
- So many activities (e.g., Balboa park, zoo, sports teams, beach, etc.)
- Getting to see this side of the country
- Great shopping
- Restaurants galore
- Wearing basically whatever I want to work
- Messy hair, don’t care
- Umm, I think Friday was maybe the second time I’ve worn my normal black eyeliner get-up since I moved out here?
- Breweries and more breweries
- Oh, and wineries too
- Watching Sonny and Duke’s #blossomingbrolove
- Basically living completely and totally drama free (woosaaaah)
- Driving into work every morning and seeing this…
Overall – taking into consideration the state of my mental health since I’ve relocated – I’d like to think California is winning. That’s not to say she will still be winning six months, or a year, or five years from now. But for the time being, I took a chance on tails and I’m not disappointed.
With that being said, maybe the past being so tangible is a good thing.
Because if a quick glance at an app on my phone allows me to assess my current situation more effortlessly, and you know, stir up all these warm-fuzies… then maybe glancing back is doing more good than harm. After all, the great thing about just visiting “what was,” is that you can always go back to focusing on the “what is.”
So, ironically, I guess the Sour Patch Kids really did say it best: “Sour. Sweet. Gone.”
I would just appreciate it if the sour doses could be fewer and farther between. Orrrr, better yet, those memories can be the ones locked in that box at the bottom of the ocean. ; )